8 Signs to know he is a trustable man
He supports and nurtures your best interests as a woman.
A trustable man will encourage the best for you. Simple as that. He will want your life to flourish in every way. He’ll advocate for you to do what lights you up. He’ll encourage you to deepen your relationship with other women, with yourself, with your family, and with God. He will have a sense of what is truly “good” for you and will be your biggest ally in the journey of living that out.
He receives the valuable feedback you offer him as a gift, without trying to please you.
A trustable man will recognize that you have a perspective of him that no one else has, and he will not only receive the feedback you have for him, he’ll seek it out. He’ll ask for it. Not from a sense of being not good enough and needing to be a good boy. From his maturity - the warrior in him that wants to sharpen his life. (Bonus points if he goes to other trustable men for reflection, feedback and support as well).
He is capable of conflict with you without losing the thread of love.
The sign of a good relationship is not a lack of conflict - it’s how it handles conflict when it arises. A trustable man will be able to engage in the tussle of conflict with you in a way that doesn’t lose the thread of love (or at least for not very long!). How quickly does he ask for forgiveness, or forgive you? Is he able to smile amidst an argument in a way that reminds you both of love’s presence?
His presence in your life encourages you to mature emotionally, psychologically & spiritually.
The right man will force you to grow. Not aggressively, his mere participation in your life will be like a magnet that draws you towards your own initiations of maturity. His deep presence will reflect to you all the ways you’re still trying to be a good girl, or seeking validation, or being subtly manipulative. His presence won’t tolerate anything less than the greatness of love you’re here for.
The general state of your nervous system is one of peace.
When you’re in the presence of a trustable man, your body will show it. Your general state will be one of calm, softness, and tranquility. His presence will invoke a peace that many can confuse as boredom because they’re so used to the hellish roller-coaster of unhealthy relationships. If your nervous system is genuinely calm and at ease in your relationship, that’s a really good sign you’re with a trustable man.
He is devoted to his own growth both within and beyond the relationship.
A trustable man will recognize that your relationship isn’t the end of the journey, it’s the beginning, and will be committed to using your relationship to show him the areas of life that need him to grow. He will use the crucible of your relationship as fuel to grow physically, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually, financially, and s*xually.
Your women friends trust & like him (and remind you why when you forget).
If your friends don’t like your man for you, that’s not a good sign. If they do, trust them. Lean on them. Your close friends will have a more objective view and will remind you of the love that’s available to you if he is truly a good man for you.
Your life is led in an overall positive direction through your relationship with him.
This is a simple one, but important because the presence of love over time doesn’t lie. You can tell when a relationship is serving someone or not. If you’re with a trustable man, the general arc of your life will bend towards goodness.
